Intentional Love

Fifteen years ago, a little girl stood peering into the windows of tiny, newly-minted St. James Tearoom while her grandmother finished her business in the dress shop next door. She asked if they could go in, and see what was happening within. Victoria, the grandmother, and little Nicole came in to see what it was all about.

Victoria made reservations for herself and her three granddaughters – a special place for Grandmother-Granddaughter Connection.  Victoria and her three granddaughters have been making tea together at the St. James a regular event ever since. Now the girls are beautiful, grown women, and the joy of this special time for their unique relationship is stronger than ever. What a bond has been forged through the years between grandmother and granddaughters!

I asked the four of them “What sets you apart and makes your relationship unique and so successful?” Their answer?

“Intentional love.”

Wow. Their commitment to each other through the years has paid off. There is such a beautiful, intimate relationship between this grandmother and her granddaughters; it’s obvious they hold a vital and prominent place in each other’s hearts.

One of the granddaughters told me they “keep each other accountable, making sure we keep up this treasured tradition. It’s important to us.” “Sometimes the mothers want to infringe on this time,” says Victoria, “but I resist!!! This is my special time alone with my precious granddaughters.”

And one can tell they are her ‘precious ones’ at a glance. They know they are loved! What a different place this world would be if every grandchild had this same knowledge!

Grandmother, granddaughters, with mommies, too!
Grandmother, granddaughters, with mommies, too!

Intentional Love – they have made a commitment. Even when they lived in different states while the girls were away at college, they continued this intentional tradition of celebrating each other and their special bond. They made a Tradition of Celebration: a planned-ahead, set-apart, just-for-them time. They celebrate Christmas here together every year, and all their birthdays (although they have had to rearrange birthdays at times to coincide with college breaks).

“This place is Sanctuary for us. This is our very own refuge, where we can feel separated from the furious rush, where we can dress up, have fun together, or simply share our deepest hearts.”

They also have many memories of Special Events they have attended together over the years. Their favorite was a Princess Tea, when Victoria brought her three grown-up princesses, dressed in royal attire. The staff, expecting little princesses, had to quickly exchange tiny teacups for adult-sized ones. Treasured times, tucked away in each one’s heart – riches, indeed.

Now they are all grown and out on their own. Nicole works with abused and neglected horses (yoga is one of her means of helping these horses!). Bailey is finishing up her Master’s in social work. She currently works in the NICU working with the distressed families whose tiny infants are in hospital. And Ciera teaches math at a local high school. Over the years Victoria has encouraged these beautiful young women to:

1) be themselves,

2) believe in themselves,

3) know they are treasured and loved, and

4) give back to their society.

They have been filled to the top with love, then encouraged to go out in the world and spread that love about. They have been Given, and taught to be Givers; they have been invested in, and taught to be intentional in doing the same.

Intentional Love. Tradition of Celebration. Quite a legacy, indeed!


Yours, for the return of Grace, Civility, Beauty, Gentility, and Excellence,

Mary Alice