Tea is a garden for the human spirit to flower, a place of Gentle Influence, a place to Build Beauty.

Tea is a perfect garden to cultivate and build beauty in our relationships.

We desire to share beauty with those around us. We should not repress that desire to participate. We harm ourselves if we do. Beauty creates within us a desire to bequeath and enrich those around us with the wealth we have enjoyed. We long to shed beauty as a fragrance, simply because it is beautiful and good, and we have had the privilege to partake.

A friend who is sad and discouraged or is under a lot of stress needs some sanctuary and some tender loving care, someone to come alongside, someone to infuse courage, or someone to simply be present. Sometimes a friend needs another person to celebrate with them or just to have some fun together! A little time for tea can be a good investment in building a beautiful relationship.

“There is no trouble so great or grave that cannot be much diminished by a nice cup of tea.” —Bernard-Paul Heroux  

This is quite the claim, but of course, it’s not the cup of tea that diminishes trouble: it is the care, the time, and the attention shown. This can mean worlds! The cup of tea is simply the vehicle used. 

Here’s a fun example of using tea to build beauty in your sphere. My dear friend Miss Vicki has a group of five friends who all love afternoon tea. They started a tea group. Every other month they have tea at one of their homes, spreading it around so each of them only needs to host once a year. They choose a theme for each tea and make a beautiful table, and all bring treats adapted to the theme and dress accordingly.

They have met for years, and the fruit from that garden is incredible. There has been fun and laughter, but they have also helped each other through cancer and through mourning death; they have celebrated each other’s victories and shared each other’s joys! The memories, the bonds, and the beauty that have been created among these friends are irreplaceable!

I can’t imagine the deep bonds formed through this. It’s incredible. But their sharing of their lives has extended even beyond their immediate circle. I know of a young woman who has been greatly impacted by their loving care, even though she was never a part of their group. When she was going through a devastating time, these five women banded together and each week, one of them would send her some special encouragement. Many years later, the young woman says they not only helped her through that painful time but they helped to change the trajectory of her life!

Through the years these women continue to celebrate life, support each other through hard times, and grow together. At each of their teas one person prepares a meditation to share so they will not neglect the deepest and most important things to them. 

To me, this is a wonderful example of a group of people taking time to build beauty into their lives and cultivate friendship. It inspires me to no end! Their dedication to each other, the joy they take in doing this for and with each other, and the fact that they each take the time, attention, and creativity to do it tells me that these women have chosen the best—the important—over the urgent and have diligently cultivated it.

This is the greatest grace in beauty, the opportunity to radiate and spread loveliness. And so we desire to create a beautiful meal, give something beautiful, or surround another with the beauty of tender care. Our hearts want to give beauty, not possess it. And our hearts are fed as we do so. Beauty increases. Goodness expands.

“I am not only responsible for my life, but for its influence.” ~John Henry Jowett

These are the questions that inspire me: How might I cause the lives of those I love to flourish and thrive? How might I use tea to grow deeper relationships? How can I build beauty around me? 

I invite you to ponder these things alongside me. Together, we can build a more winsome world.

Yours for the return of Grace, Civility, Beauty, Gentility, and Excellence,

Mary Alice Higbie